So when I started this blog, one of the things I wanted to do is write about the losses of the last few years. Share what I and even others learned in tough situations. Obviously growing from the bad times is what helps us turn things around in our lives.
The thing is lately I haven't been in the mood to write about losing family members, having a job with a major retailer move to another state and then being let go from the job I took after I decided not to move with that company. And I certainly have not been excited about writing about love, or the hope of love, being lost.
After a couple of friends and I were talking about how so many people have been going through tough times lately, I was thinking, well it makes sense to be going through so much when we hit middle age. Yes, I said it. If you are in your 40s, you're middle aged. However, these tough times don't have to be horrible times. In a way, all the losses make sense. It's like a shedding of the old skin that has to go, because a new season is here. In this case a new season of our lives.
Think about it...if you're in your 40s, you've been around long enough for there to be a chance that you may have some health issues. Our bodies go through a lot. And if people our age are old enough to suffer serious illnesses, even ones that lead to death, well the people older than us are definitely in that position. As heartbreaking as illness and death are, lost of love ones teach us not to take the time we have here and the people who we care about for granted. It teaches us to live each day to the fullest, because we don't know how much time we have left on earth. It wakes us up.
Also, job loss is no surprise. If you've been working long enough, especially for the same company, some times things have to change. If they've operated out of one location for a long time, they may move. If you've been doing the same job for years or decades, you may suffer burn out. That's not the case with everyone, but for some it gets harder, and they may no longer be the perfect fit. It's part of life. At the same time, many of us picked our careers when we were teenagers deciding what to major in at college. Yet, as life goes on, we learn so much not only on the job front but in life. Maybe we have skills and talents we didn't even realize when we were a junior in high school. Maybe it's time for us to contribute to the world in another way during our 40-, 50, or 60-hour workweek.
As for relationships, well it can be difficult to stay with even the ones we love the most. People change just as we change, but sometimes we don't change in the same direction. Welcoming new people in our lives can bring out sides of us we never knew existed and help us contribute to and enjoy our relationships in different and maybe even deeper ways.
Don't get me wrong. When tough times hit we have every reason in the world to cry and yell and do whatever we need to do to let it out and deal with it. Yet, when we hit middle age we are starting the second half of our lives. So maybe in a way all this change is necessary. Maybe we need to let go of what once worked but no longer does, or things that we forced in our lives. Or maybe in addition to all the great things we have experienced in the past there are more wonderful things on the horizon, even if those things are different. We still have more to do and to experience. We have more to contribute to this great earth. So maybe we need to let go of what doesn't work, or what has become too comfortable. Maybe when we hit our 40s it's time to take everything we've experienced in life and really grow from it and move on with no excuses. The 40s can be a time in our lives where we either give in to the losses and crawl into a ball and give up, or a time in our lives when we really find out what we are made of, and we fully come into our own.
We were meant to live fully every day of our lives, even when things aren't exactly how we had hope. Go live and be the best version of you. Yes, there is much left behind, but there is so many more wonderful things ahead. Let's go find out what they are!
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